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Jan 1, 2013
According to the 'western' calendar, it's already the new year 2013. Another 365 rounds to go. Hopefully everything will turn out to be much better that before :)


Some might have the good turns but for some it's the most heart wrenching beginning. But fret not my dears, no matter what happened we have to keep going. If the one we love leave us behind and never to come back. Weep and let everything out, then rise again. Our Almighty God is always there watching over us. He's there when we're sad or happy. Have faith in urself.

When i'm down with all the hardship that i have to go through. When i'm about to break down. I'll cry and cry till it hurts my lungs. I wish that everything was just a dream or i wish to vanish. But this is what my road of life looks like and i have to go on even if it gets too much and even if i goes astray. Sometimes, I forgot to sit longer and talk to Him. Sometimes, I was not sincere enough being with Him. Sometimes, I forgot to be thankful of what i have for all my life. Due to his immense loves, he will call me back and I will be on the right path again. Even if the whole world outcast us, He never abandoned us.

When the pain was too intense, i will complaint and be mad. But it was totally wrong. With all the hardship He gave us now is something he's preparing for the future. We never know what awaits, but He already sets everything right. I myself sometimes complaint how unfair my life is. I wish i could take that back and i feel like a fool. Without realising i became so strong mentally and  not easily shaken. I didn't get mixed up with wrong people nor i turned out wild. Above all, i could be in my parents arms for the longest time than my siblings :).

People might say many unpleasant things about me, hate me or despise me. I survived the biggest 'back-stabbing' of my life. When we don't care bout what they said, things will be much better. All of the sickening false words they spread around about me, i didn't even cracked from it. I was angry because i did so many things that bring them to fame but I was thrown away and fed with ungratefulness. Alas, I do not care and may God repay me with something much more wonderful. They are now lost somewhere in the abyss of my memory trash can. *giggles*


Certain people query about my well-being. Of what i'm doing and what i'm going to do. Thank you for being so curious and interested in me.If u're being such a pester and a crack-pot, no thank you and stay away from me. Some sees me as zero because i have nothing special in my life and i'm not worthy. I just want to tell you that, there are still others who think i'm special and they are the most wonderful person in this world. Even if you don't like me for who i am and what i'm lacking; what's in you that's so special that you could look down on me?  Our life is limited, we never know when we might die. I wanted to explore this world but that is quite impossible. What i can do is learn as much as i can. I hate repetitive works especially studying. I hate school except my friends and few teachers. I hate being caged and doing something that is not going to be use in my life later on. Aaand that was what i actually did till i finished my high school. I never care about my result because those papers means nothing much. I love practicals more than theories. I learnt many things by heart. From tedious works to more of a challenging ones. Well there is nothing to be proud of but i can at least fix and change burnt wires in plug, fix the lamp, make simple electric connections and also little plumbing. At least i know the importance things about taking care of car's engine 0.o. I can bake, cook and most of the house-works. I can do gardening and drawing. I do dance and online gaming. And quite good in computer stuffs. All that's left is perfecting my sewing skills.

If u roll ur eyes while reading this, let me ask you; can u do all of these? If you can, well congratulation you are a perfect human being for me.

This year April, i will be 24 years old. My god bless me on that. I feel like i'm still a little child. A part of me is scared as if my life is like layers of roses; each year goes by is equal to the petals that are drying out and dropping one at a time. ~.~! I'm hopping for this February to finally starts my shop and nothing intriguing comes along. What kind of shop you may ask, well i'll let you guess. I'll try to post some updates of how the progression. Where it might be, hmm...surprise! :)

Here are the most touching songs that will make me cry everytime i listen to them:

    

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